Debunking Myths - If Men got Pregnant, Things Would Be Different

Myth:  Many of my clients are single mothers, either women who got pregnant before they were married whose partners did not marry them, or women who were married, but later divorced, after one or more children were born.  Some single mothers have very young children, while others are struggling to raise a handful of teens without much male influence.  Although I have never heard a mother wish she didn’t have her children, many have said that if men were the ones to get pregnant, things would be different.

Fact: Although we cannot prove such a theory, I’m going to go out on a limb and say that the concept, is most certainly true.  It is my opinion that if men were the ones to have to carry pregnancies, there would not be so many mothers out there raising children without fathers.  However, I would also wager a guess that there would be about 80% fewer children in the world as well.

I do not condone men getting women pregnant, then leaving them to raise children on their own.  However, other than cases of rape, pregnant women were at least 50% responsible for their own pregnancies and for the choice of the father.  When they choose badly, impulsively, or even deceptively become pregnant, they put themselves into a position where they are quite likely to become unsupported during their pregnancy and during the life of the child.  The good news about that is that it also means women have the power to make better choices.

We hear a great deal of talk about women’s reproductive rights and how it’s her body and that she should be able to do with it what she wants.  If that’s what you believe, it must also follow that if she chooses to get pregnant and remain pregnant, that’s a choice she made and she must be willing to face all the consequences that go along with becoming pregnant and not later waste her energy blaming a man for her predicament.

Yes, if men had to get pregnant, things would be different.  There would be fewer unwanted children.  Women need to take special care to make sure that all the children they bear are truly wanted by both parents if they want the best chance to guarantee the child a future of being supported by both of their natural parents.

Marlo Archer, Ph.D.
Down to Earth Enterprises
1250 E. Baseline Rd., Suite 102
Tempe, AZ 85283
(480) 705-5007