Honoring Children

Child Abuse Prevention month was designated by presidential proclamation, April 1983. Although child abuse prevention needs to be addressed every day, designating a month to reinforce a commitment to protecting children from this heinous crime is important. The abuse many children endure, if committed against another adult would result in arrest and sometimes jail time. Whereas, only the worst cases of child abuse are ever reported or adjudicated.

Arizona Child Protective Services’ (CPS) last report covers the 6-month period, April 1 – September 30, 2004.  During this period CPS received 19,165 reports of child abuse, neglect and abandonment.  1,520 reports were substantiated cases. CPS has maintained a 100% response rate since 1998.

During this period 8,839 children were in out-of-home care; of those 2,866 were with relatives. 6,805 (77%) had been in out-of-home care less than two years. Of the 8,839 children in out-of-home care, 1,893 were approved for adoption; 1,624 were in adoptive homes awaiting final adoption; 4,530 had a case plan to return to their parents.

DEFINITION OF CHILD ABUSE:

· Physical abuse—includes hitting, spanking, swatting, smacking, whacking, thumping, bopping, switching, paddling, beating, burning, punching, pulling hair, arms, ears, nose, shaking, choking/strangling, force feeding, food deprivation, locked in closets or other confined spaces.

· Emotional abuse—includes: criticizing, insulting, rejecting, withholding affection/ emotional abandonment, shouting or swearing at, screaming or yelling at, negating, minimizing, humiliating, scapegoat, shaming, finding fault, blaming, ridiculing, diminishing.

· Sexual abuse—includes: rape, sexual touch/fondling, showing print or video/internet pornography, allowing a child to see or hear sights and sounds, which are sexual. Coercing the child into behavior that has sexual content or overtone for the adult.

HOW YOU CAN PREVENT CHILD ABUSE:

Be a nurturing parent and make your child(ren) a priority.

· Avoid spanking. There are thousands of reasons why spanking is bad for children—the least of which is that it engenders rage which promotes future violence. Although spanking is a coveted form of discipline for many parents, there is NOT one good logical reason to hit/spank children. Furthermore, we have laws prohibiting adults hitting an adult. How can hitting a child be OK if it isn’t OK to hit an adult?  There are over100 ways to discipline a child without shouting, screaming or hitting/spanking.

· Give your child affection everyday. This gives them a sense of security, belonging and support.

· Observe them demonstrating appropriate behavior and praise them.

· Develop consequences for unacceptable behavior. Be consistent.

· Listen. Give your child undivided attention when they talk.  Be patient. Remember children move at a different pace when they talk.

· Spend quality time doing things your child enjoys; as well as including your child in activities you enjoy. Plan to spend special one-on-one time with each child at least once a week. Play with your child, talk and read with your child.

· Last, but not least give your child respect, giving respect teaches your child to give respect.

Reach out to others—family, friends, neighbors

· Create a support system. Isolation is often a contributing factor to child abuse. Take breaks to do things alone while someone watches your child(ren).

· Know the warning signs of abuse or neglect.  Report any suspected abuse or neglect— allowing authorities to determine whether there is abuse.

Take part in prevention efforts

· Work to change Arizona law to prohibit paddling in schools.  Arizona is one of twenty-two states, which permits paddling with a wooden paddle in schools.

· Work to institute mandatory parenting classes in high school and college. Parenting courses would meet the criteria for already mandatory humanities courses.

· Form a parenting club to foster effective parenting.

· Become a child advocate

· Participate in child abuse prevention and neglect efforts.

Children are our greatest natural resource.  We are responsible for creating a better future.

Dorothy M. Neddermeyer, PhD, specializes in family issues, including sexual abuse, incest and physical abuse prevention and recovery, as therapist, author, consultant, lecturer, and trainer. If I’d Only Known… Sexual Abuse in or out of the Family: A Guide to Prevention is available at a 15% discount direct from the publisher at http://www.gen-assist.com/book.asp 480-704-0603