Sad Heroes

It isn’t that dad died that fosters such melancholy from time to time, it’s that he died without my ever learning the life lessons I know he held in his heart and soul.  A rarity for his breed, a physician who was both good in business and had great penmanship, both skills I long for regularly.  More, he lived his life knowing that at 2 he was very nearly the cause of his family’s demise while they hid in a cellar as Russian Cossacks looted their home.  Had he cried out, he would have had to be held tightly against his mothers bosom to silence him in order for the family not to be found.  Smothered to the point of suffocation if necessary, it was a lesson he would never forget.  It drove him to live a life constantly striving to be one of the best healers in the world.  He was.

Like many men, my dad is my hero.  One of many I turn to for advice though Alzheimer’s took away the data I yearn for long before I had the maturity to bask in his wisdom.  Today, my dad sits on my Board of Directors.  Yes I know, he passed away in ’89.  I didn’t say he took up much space at the table, only that his wisdom guides the growth and development of my business.  Other members of my Board of Directors include, Vince Lombardi, Albert Einstein, Mother Theresa, Jesus Christ, Martin Luther King, Jr., John Patterson, Michael Jordan, Armand Hammer Sun Tzu, and my younger brother Gary.  (Gary, if you’re reading this, I know you don’t fall into the category of deceased…, but I do love the depth of our conversations and the balance your years in psychology provide so ride with me a few more paragraphs.)

I know what many of you business owners are thinking.  It must be incredibly easy to be responsible to a Board of Directors who are 99% dead.  It isn’t.  Ok, calling a Board Meeting is pretty easy and their travel expenses to attend are pretty nominal but the fact is the legacy they have left behind haunts every waking thought and some sleeping thoughts too.  It isn’t easy being great but my Board has all accomplished the task.  Yes, you too Gary. 

Most of the folks are public figures and their records are not that hard to discover.  What I am more interested in however is the story behind the greatness.  What drove them to accomplish what they did?  I believe in each and every one of them, a moment of sadness, a fleeting awareness of some injustice, a connection to what they wanted versus what they were experiencing created a spark that never extinguished.  Instead it fanned a flame within them that burned to right the wrong and carried with them and all the power they could muster, the energy to overcome every obstacle on the way to public awareness of their greatness.

Volumes are written about their accomplishments, little is known of their drive. I want to touch the place within me, that that drive lives.  So I ask them.  When my life gets wickedly out of balance with no time to let my brain or my body rest, Vince Lombardi screams fundamentals at me.  “Blocking and tackling” he says.  “You don’t need a lot of gadget plays to be successful, just execute well on the simple plays.”

When a student of mine in sales seems far too dense to understand what I am teaching, and I want to give up on them in frustration and anger, Mother Theresa whispers her famous wisdom, “If I hadn’t reached out to the first one, I never could have saved thousands.”  It’s much easier to connect with someone from that perspective.

Their guidance and wisdom in my day to day activities are priceless.

More than that, what drove them to be worthy of being written about is powerful.  At least these are the stories at the board meetings…  When you see men with sharp tempers like Vince Lombardi or John Patterson (Patterson is the founder of National Cash Register and the creator of modern day selling) you know their story wasn’t always pleasant.   Whatever gave Martin Luther King the power to preach peace in the face of so much hatred must have been a force beyond measure.  And you know the story that faced Jesus as he bore his cross to his death.

I want that kind of strength.  I know that to achieve my dreams I have some pretty big mountains to climb.  I am well aware of financial obstacles, people who don’t believe in my dreams obstacles and the myriad minutia of government detail obstacles every business owner faces.  I know that my hero’s started from something sad and faced sadness along the way.  I also know they believed in their dreams enough to stay in the game.  Their singleness of focus was their life’s definition.  The day before I pass away and what ever minute wisdom I may have to pass along is lost, I can look back and realize my life was consistent with my dreams and my accomplishments are worthy of my own satisfaction. 

I hope one day, my son will look through the sadness and see me as a hero too.